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What Your Long History Of Toxic Relationships Is Trying To Tell You, According To A Therapist

When someone questions my admittedly terrible dating history, I am tempted to challenge the assumption that I’m the problem. After all, why should I be held accountable for other people’s questionable behavior?

For a long time, I wondered why all those men couldn’t treat me right and overlooked the obvious fact staring me right in the face.

Loving people well and being disappointed wasn’t the problem. I am not responsible for their actions.

I am, however, responsible for my own. Why did I tolerate it?

Accountability and trauma recovery

It took hours of trauma therapy and diving into the deep inner work of healing before I realized the why.

The coping strategies I once used to survive trauma left me with reactions and decisions that just don’t seem rational from the outside looking in.

I outgrew the need for those skills but didn’t realize how deeply ingrained they were or how to replace them with new, healthier coping techniques that would allow me to thrive and not merely survive.

It took a long time to figure out just how much trauma had infiltrated my life, reactions, and decisions. It would take even longer to soothe my nervous system and break old habits to learn new ones.

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