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The Simple Rule That Keeps Relationships Happy For Life

If you are still waiting and wishing that your partner will just see the light and behave the way you think he or she should, then you are living a fantasy.

Most of us live with a figment of our imagination rather than the real flesh and blood person who is our partner. We see our partners through our image of what we think they are, rather than seeing them as they are or as they see themselves.

And here’s the rub: when you take up the banner to “improve” your partner, you are annihilating him or her.

You are wishing the real person to be gone and your image of him to take his place. And you treat him accordingly. But that’s also what your partner does to you… and you wonder why your relationship isn’t going so well now that the euphoric stage of romantic love has passed?

I invite you to take a journey of discovery. Engage your partner with curiosity and surrender any judgment. You may discover a whole new, amazing world. Your partner is an “other,” with a whole world inside, a world you cannot fully enter, and that you cannot change. You may want sameness— for your partner to be just like you or your ideal image— but that’s not going to happen.

The simple rule that builds a great relationship

If you want a great relationship, you have to let your partner be.

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